Sword Art Online II Ep. 1: Get Out of My Head, Kawahara.

I am carrying this post series over from my original SAO write-ups on another website. If I end up working a fair bit of my anime-related writing time on another place, it would make sense to at least copy that over to here too.

Here’s the general feel of how these write-ups are supposed to go: I link screenshots and be snarky about it. It’s designed for people who either are not watching the show or have watched it and are interested in seeing me suffer. You may notice after a few posts that I am reluctant to give this show any chance of redeeming itself and will overlook any potential positive executions in this anime for the sake of being funny. That’s because SAO had two full arcs to be at least decent and it has failed me spectacularly both times. Do not expect any deep-level thinking or serious interpretation of the show’s themes and messages. I’m just having my fun with a truly shitty anime.

Episode 1: Gun World

  • I suppose it’s pertinent for all these super important gun gamers to be watching a talk show in an e-tavern. Because fuck yeah male dominance in gaming.
  • Zexceed is so full of himself that he stands up out of his chair and the camera revolves around him as he explains to the plebian masses exactly how to play a game. I don’t understand whether they’re making him out to be a haughty but super-important figure in GGO or a complete tool. If it’s both, that’s not reflected well in the mudslinging that unfolds between him and Dark Wind, who I think is another pro player participating in the same talk show. It really makes you wonder how these sorts of people end up at the top. Trashtalking does indeed exist in professional gaming, but usually it isn’t delivered face-to-face like it is here.
  • Zexceed, false victor… you will now be judged by true power!” So we learn two things from this new villain. One, he doesn’t view top players of GGO in a particularly good light, and two, it’s because these players subscribe to some “false power” that he feels the need to display “true power”. Physically. By killing the shit out of them.
  • So
  • you’re telling me
  • Because people are being arrogant shitheads on a videogame
  • On the internet
  • You’re gonna murder them

  • I mean, sure. Whatever. You can have your mentally insane villain and still have a nice story to tell. That doesn’t stop my understanding of his motivations from sounding silly. Maybe the villain has a much more nuanced reason for killing online gamers and it’ll manifest later. But for now, let me just laugh.
  • what do you mean his name is literally death gun
  • i thought the guy who wrote this story was a grown adult
  • Soon, it’ll be a year.” Not quite, Perfect Waifu. SAO actually aired two years ago. I guess getting tentacled and molested three times over does shit to your long-term memory.
  • Time for Perfect Waifu to say Perfect Waifu things, such as asking questions about the hyperreality of virtual reality and what the real world truly is! What a perfect topic for a Perfect Waifu to talk about!
  • Then Kirito enters in by positing the option of the difference of exchange in information between the real and virtual worlds, thus creating a rift in understanding of how we communicate within both realms of understanding and-

  • I’ve seen enough hentai to know where this went.
  • Then they start talking about a palace. Well, it doesn’t feel like Kirito and Asuna are talking about it. It feels more like they’re being used as mouthpieces for Reki Kawahara to infodump the shit out of us. Who are they even talking to? It’s like hearing someone say “Hey, I got a cool sword! This will surely increase my battle capabilities!” I can’t imagine either of them to naturally begin infodumping to each other if it weren’t for the sake of informing us of what some shit is. Unless this is their idea of flirting.
  • These twins are super cute
  • I mean, wow
  • can i watch an anime about them instead
  • After somehow reaching the topic of their futures, Kirito says, “I think I’m going to go from a player to a creator.” That’s rich. He’s talking about this as if he’s already finished his education and is looking for a job. If that’s truly the case according to the precious light novels, I have no indication that this is such. Besides, being a player wasn’t his job in the first place, it was his hobby. Of course, this doesn’t even begin to compete with what Asuna’s about to say:
  • I want to stay with you forever, Kirito-kun.

  • IT’S HAPPENING AGAIN, GUYS
  • Sure, Kirito says no but his inner Gary Stu says YES
  • Come on, you have this important government guy grasping at your shirt like an embarrassed kouhai struggling to confess to him. Now you have to be all “Well, if you insist…”
  • While they’re trying their best to make the “enter the game and risk your life” option to be the best possible one, this show it making it pretty obvious that it’s doing a lot of crazy stuff to make that happen, like making federal investigations into the company servers impossible since they’re all located in America.
  • I like to think that this show it utilizing the whole reflections are the in-game personas thing from last season. I’m not sure if the show is smart enough to realize that though. This could just be interpreted as a more effective way to show that Kirito is contemplating something.
  • If the world is comprised of an axis called time and a plane called space-

  • Fascinating.
  • I swear, this anime’s answer for all its “breathtaking scenery” is to add sunshine, rainbows, or both to whatever we’re looking at.
  • Sometimes they add moons, too. If you know what I mean.
  • Maybe Suou didn’t die at the end of Darker Than Black. Maybe she just got transported to an alternate universe with her trusty anti-tank rifle and her hair changed color as a result.
  • Next.” Oh boy, not another episode.

2 comments

  1. Hinoa F. Arash · · Reply

    The lack of Rainbowtext disturbs and confuses me. Fortunately, I have a solution.

    http://patorjk.com/text-color-fader/

    It ain’t flashing rainbow text, but it’s still rainbow text!

  2. […] these SAO posts are gonna be structured the same way appropriant structures his because I’m lazy and not feeling very creative. Plus I’d rather just restructure my own […]

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